beginnings

My life thus far seems like a big mess that I need to untangle. It isnt the life anyone would want. Its not the life I want. I realize that I am my own worst enemy, that only I can change the situations that I put myself into. Ive never had a guy love me, and it hurts everyday. The last guy that I was involved with never seemed to really want me. I eventually broke everything off cause I wasnt in it anymore. Now all I want is another chance. That sounds horrible right? Why would I want to be with a guy that was never really in it the first go around? Well, thats the thing about me.....I never know what I want till its gone. I hurt everyday and I know things need to change. I hold all my emotions inside, and I never really let them out, not even to the people closest to me. This blog will become that outlet for all my emotions, good or bad. Everything I go through from the funny to the sad will be displayed here. until next time. oh p.s. just so you all know, I am a virgin. Not necessarily a happy virgin, but one nonetheless. Right, why am I telling you this? Well....I am a very sexual person and tend to hold nothing back when talking about all things sex. be prepared. byes :)